boots...

Spring Nature Table

Easter

I had a proud moment this weekend as we enjoyed dinner at my mother-in-law's. After staring awkwardly at the table for several minutes, my almost-four-year old walked towards me.

"I need to speak in your ear, Mama," she said, blue eyes sparkling. "Can you please recommend a healthy, growing food. I don't see anything I like, Mama."

Internally gushing, "Healthy, growing food -- wow! She really is getting what I'm trying to teach. Wow...Good. For. Me!"

I scanned the table and realized there were no foods that were familiar to Lily (like say Annie's macaroni and cheese, spaghetti and meatballs, "yolky eggs," edamame, sliced apples, blueberry pancakes, Cheerios-and-milk out of the blue bowl with the built in straw, and her beloved "Chicken-Broccoli," which she has renamed "Rice-Chicken-Cheese-Broccoli" because she thinks her title makes more sense given the ingredients.)

I found her something yummy to eat that wasn't too sugary or too chocolate and sat back to marvel at what a great mom I am -- "My kid is asking for healthy-growing foods. Good. For. Me."

After exchanging some small gifts (and attempting to off-load hard-boiled, colored eggs on each other -- the Spring equivalent of August zucchinis), it was time to go.

Driving home I thought about the treasures the kids would find in their baskets the next day -- fun thrift store finds, a couple of pieces of chocolate, matchbox cars, books, colored thread for sewing, and a little duck and bunny for our Spring nature table.

I once again felt a nice comfortable swell of pride. "I really am doing okay at this whole mom thing."

Then, as we were getting ready for bed that night, at some point Lily dropped a book.

Without missing a beat. With perfect diction, she let out a slow, half-whispered "Fuuuuuuck!"

Trying not to look too shocked and stifling my giggles, I smiled and handed her the book.

Yup. She is definitely listenlearning from me.

Chicken-Broccoli Recipe

This was a recipe from my dad's cousin/my mom's friend (i.e. the person who introduced my parents to each other) and it used Campbell's cream of chicken soup. I remember loving it as a child. We now make it without the canned soup and serve it over brown rice to make it a little more healthy but it really just is the ultimate super-creamy comfort food.

1 breast of skinnless/boneless chicken boiled for 15-20 minutes (or breast meat left over from a roast made earlier in the week)

The florets of two good-sized heads of broccoli - boiled until easy to puncture with a fork

Sauce:
Make a roux by melting 5 tablespoons of butter in a heavy-bottom pan over medium heat. Add 5 tablespoons of flour. Mix the two ingredients together and then add 2 cups of chicken broth (or one small package of Pacific free-range chicken broth) and one cup of milk (preferably raw, whole milk). Bring ingredients to a rolling boil and stir fairly consistently. (I tend to start the next part of the sauce and stir every minute or two.)

Sauce, Part Two:
Measure one cup of mayonnaise into a mixing bowl. (My sister insists that it has to be Kraft mayonnaise - I don't have a strong opinion here. And one of my aunt's uses plain yogurt to replace some/all of the mayonnaise.)

To the mayonnaise add: a capful of lemon juice (a.k.a. 1 teaspoon -- I think), a capful of curry powder (again, I think this is 1 teaspoon).

Are you starting to get a sense of cooking this recipe? I don't measure carefully. This recipe is adaptable, easy to put together, and is a cross-generation crowd-pleaser in our family.

While I'm making the mayonnaise-curry-lemon mixture, I'm stirring the roux every minute (or every couple of minutes) or so. My four-year-old also loves to mix the mayo-mixture together. (We usually do this while my almost-two year old, who also loves to help but tends to be a little less...umm...helpful, is taking his nap.)

To the mayonnaise mixture, I add the roux and my daughter mixes.

Meanwhile, I lay out the chicken and the cooked broccoli in a glass lasagna-size pan. We like a higher broccoli to chicken ratio in our house. And then we pour the sauce over the chicken and broccoli and top with grated cheddar cheese (or sometimes a "mozzarella and cheddar and something else" blend). Recently I started purchasing shredded mozzarella and cheddar cheese from Organic Valley. (I like what I've read about the company.) Use whatever amount you like. I think the original recipe called for 2 cups, which is usually one package. That was a little too cheesy for us so I cut it back a bit.

Bake in a (preheated) oven at 350* for about 30-40 minutes.

Once that's in, scoop out one cup of brown rice* and rinse it in a colander under warm water (removes bitter coating) and mix with two cups of water, a little salt and a little olive oil or butter. Bring to a boil and then simmer very low (I use my back "simmer" burner with a diffuser plate) for about 40 minutes.

Just before taking the casserole out of the oven, I put the broiler on for a minute or two (I use my oven's timer so I don't get distracted and burn the whole thing) and lightly brown the top so the cheese gets a little crispy.

Serve over the rice and with bread for dipping (which is more like slurping up every last drop of the sauce)!

* For a special treat sometimes I use Jasmine or Basmati flavored brown rice (which I honestly can not tell apart unless maybe I tried them side-by-side). I think the flavored rice adds a nice ummm...flavor. Same ratio of rice to water as the regular brown rice, same approximate cooking time.

felted eggs drying in the sun...

What is the contrast?

Today is the contrast.

Today was not enough sleep last night. Sick kid in arms for the past three days. Other kid in time-out or in a full tantrum (or both) far too much. And way too much tv.

Today was ugly and painful and seemingly unstoppable.

It was complicated by the fact that I felt like my husband was judging me all day.

I felt like he thinks I am solely responsible for my daughter's totally out-of-control behavior because I am too easy on her and I screwed up and told her about death (our sheep was eaten by a coyote and I told her and at the same time explained what "meat" really is) when she was two and a half.

(It seems a little insane as I write it but at the time it just really felt like the right thing to do. Lying about it felt wrong. Evading her questions felt wrong. Remembering how devastated I was when some of these types of issues entered my reality when I was much older, I thought if I just made it a "no big deal...it's nature...it's just how it is" kind of thing, that that is just what it would be.

It wasn't. But that's a story for another day.)

Today all the (unnamed until now) guilt that I've been feeling about putting my one-year-old in daycare three mornings a week so I can write and go to yoga and take a shower by myself, and go grocery shopping without anyone "helping" me, really came crashing in on me.

And my anxieties about what is happening with my daughter's increasing anxieties and my fears and guilt that maybe my husband is right and I did totally screw her up by giving her too much information too soon.

And a house that has not been cleaned, organized, loved, or even noticed in well over a week. And a husband who fortunately, has been cleaned, but not loved in the way that a husband loves to be loved, in far too long.

And stress about not knowing what the heck I want to cook and/or eat yet again.

And ongoing feelings of discouragement about my weight.

This is the contrast and when/if I am ready, it will be my great teacher!